Well, Thursday we gave Lil Miss her eviction notice, guess she wasn't too thrilled about that! At 5:30 Friday night my water broke. I felt a "thump thump" and rushed to the bathroom. I barely made it before AF started to run down my leg, soaking my underwear. At first I thought it was just pee, so I started to look for toilet paper, but we didn't have any and it just kept running down my leg and I couldn't stop it. So I took a gander, figured my water and had broken and called the doctor. He told me to go ahead and go to the hospital, so we grabbed my hospital bag, and off we went. Up till then, I had just been feeling slightly crampy, nothing serious. We hit the road at 6, by 6:20 I was contracting. Thats when we hit traffic, there'd been a wreck, so we spent a good ten- to twenty minutes in bumper-to-bumper traffic. Wonderful. We finally made it to the hospital by about 7 pm. By this time I was contracting bad, and dilated 1.5 cm. I wanted a med-free birth, so I tried to ride the contractions out: but didn't count on back labor. I finally asked for some pain meds because it was just too much. I was still at 1.5 cm dilated, and the OB won't give a epidural until dilated at 4 cm so they gave me Nubain. I took it. At that point I turned the tv on in the room and watched old episodes of Reba on Lifetime. By the end of The Protector, however, the Nubain has worn off, and I crying for a epidural. Luckily I was 4 cm dilated, I got the epi at 6 cm. This included a lot of "I can't"s and crying. I managed to pee myself before they inserted the catheter, and mentioned that to the nurse. :/ After laying back down on the bed, I pretty much passed out.
At 5 am Saturday morning my OB checks me, and I'm ready to go. We do a few practice pushes in, but Lil Miss is still high up, so they raise the bed as far as it would raise in hopes that gravity would pull her down. By about 7, I'm pushing again. However Lil Miss is being stubborn, she's at 0 station and won't go any farther. By 8, they're prepping me for a c-section. They bring in the anathesialogist and give me a whole new epidural because the one I had last night wore off. Like the one before it, I pretty much conked out, so I missed a lot of the actual birth. My dad was in the OR there with me, and he said as soon they pulled Gwen out, the neonatologist scooped her up and started working on her while the OB stitched me up. Then they rushed her to NICU, and I was rolled back to my room. I was pretty much out of it till about 12 when my mother, her ex, her best friend and best friend's husband showed up. Then they moved me to the Maternity ward room.
Well, 40 weeks and 5 days today. We have an eviction notice for Lil' Miss. At today's appointment we scheduled for inducement on Monday night. I still am 0 cm dilated and 0% effacement. It just looks like my body likes being pregnant. lol
I'm due today, and still no progress. I'm not sure how much longer I can put up with this back pain, I've been feeling it for about 2 weeks now. I told the doctor at my appt yesterday, and he said nothing about it :( Its a vicious cycle; the pain is so bad because I don't walk nearly enough, but I don't walk because of the severe pain. :( I don't know what to do. I swore to myself I wouldn't be one of those ladies who complained about being overdue, and I'm trying not to, I really am. I know most first time mom's go late, and I even prepared myself to go late. But I certainly didn't expect this severe back pain. I guess it's not something you can really prepare yourself for. We're all ready for Lil'Miss to make her grand entrance, she can come any time. Please Baby, hurry up! You're hurting mommy. :( The only thing left for us to do is to install the carseat base into the car (I won't leave the car seat in the car because of a certain someone who won't stop smoking and I don't want Lil'Miss's things covered in the cancerous smoke).
I swear, the farther along I get, the less patience I have for my own mother. I know one shouldn't talk bad about their parents, but my own mother is a piss-poor mother, always has been, always will be. It's getting under my skin when she sits there, gloats and acts like she's Mother of the Year. She's not even in the running. Everything was always her first, and everything else was a poor second. Including her own daughter. I understand that right now, with our finances, I can't afford everything I want; but I swear I do. not. want. to. hear. the. words "the hospital will provide" one more time. If I do, I'm going to explode. I have wants, just like the next person, just like her. I want my wants fulfilled, just like the next person, just like her. She won't buy me the things I want, or need, but she'll buy cigarettes. A pack of bottles cost what? About twelve dollars... Four packs of cigarettes cost how much? About sixteen or so. So how the hell does she not have money for a fucking pack of 3 bottles? Or pacifiers, or burp clothes/bibs, or diapers... or... She gets four packs of cigarettes each. week. every. week. Sometimes I look at her, and I worry if I'll be just like her. I worry sometimes, if in 20 years my own daughter will hate me as much as I hate her... not because I was a bad mother, but because I tried to overcompensate for the fact that my own mother was such a piss poor mom. When is too much too much?
I swear, the farther along I get, the less patience I have for my own mother. I know one shouldn't talk bad about their parents, but my own mother is a piss-poor mother, always has been, always will be. It's getting under my skin when she sits there, gloats and acts like she's Mother of the Year. She's not even in the running. Everything was always her first, and everything else was a poor second. Including her own daughter. I understand that right now, with our finances, I can't afford everything I want; but I swear I do. not. want. to. hear. the. words "the hospital will provide" one more time. If I do, I'm going to explode. I have wants, just like the next person, just like her. I want my wants fulfilled, just like the next person, just like her. She won't buy me the things I want, or need, but she'll buy cigarettes. A pack of bottles cost what? About twelve dollars... Four packs of cigarettes cost how much? About sixteen or so. So how the hell does she not have money for a fucking pack of 3 bottles? Or pacifiers, or burp clothes/bibs, or diapers... or... She gets four packs of cigarettes each. week. every. week. Sometimes I look at her, and I worry if I'll be just like her. I worry sometimes, if in 20 years my own daughter will hate me as much as I hate her... not because I was a bad mother, but because I tried to overcompensate for the fact that my own mother was such a piss poor mom. When is too much too much?
So, my mom's exboyfriend-turned-roommate went to visit family recently, and his sister sent back a baby swing, a baby tub, a wooden highchair, a play yard, and another play mat. And clothes, lots and lots of clothes. Wow! I'll have photos soon. I'm just amazed at how many things I've received for babygirl so far, all of it unasked for. My mom's best friend also bought me a stroller just today as well. Outside of small things (pacifiers, bottles, etc. etc.) we're all set for babygirl's grand entrance. While I'm certain that she'll come late, I'm just so tired of the back pain, I'm begging her to hurry up! It's gotten to the point where I'm wondering if I need to call the doctor's office, it's that severe. Walking helps, but not much. At my last appointment there had been no progress, just back pain. :(
At yesterday's doctor visit I'm still not dilated, not effaced, and she's still floating. :( No progress sucks.
How is baby growing?
Your baby's waiting to greet the world! She continues to build a layer of fat to help control her body temperature after birth, but it's likely she already measures about 20 inches and weighs a bit over 7 pounds, a mini watermelon. (Boys tend to be slightly heavier than girls.) The outer layers of her skin are sloughing off as new skin forms underneath.
How is baby growing?
Your baby's waiting to greet the world! She continues to build a layer of fat to help control her body temperature after birth, but it's likely she already measures about 20 inches and weighs a bit over 7 pounds, a mini watermelon. (Boys tend to be slightly heavier than girls.) The outer layers of her skin are sloughing off as new skin forms underneath.
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| A peek from the door. |
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| Adorable small little Pooh Bear diaper bag. |
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| Detail of the bottle warmer. |
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| Hand-stitched bibs. |
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| Detail of the flower and butterfly bib. |
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| Detail of the "little princess" bib. |
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| The changing table was a yardsale find. :D |
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| Another yardsale find. :D |
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| Detail of the play mat. |
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| My old hope chest I hope to use as babygirl's toy chest. |
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| Detail of the cushion on the hope chest. |
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| detail of the front decoration on the hope chest. |
Your baby has really plumped up. She weighs about 6.8 pounds and she's over 19 1/2 inches long (like a leek). She has a firm grasp, which you'll soon be able to test when you hold her hand for the first time! Her organs have matured and are ready for life outside the womb.
Wondering what color your baby's eyes will be? You may not be able to tell right away. If she's born with brown eyes, they'll likely stay brown. If she's born with steel gray or dark blue eyes, they may stay gray or blue or turn green, hazel, or brown by the time she's 9 months old. That's because a child's irises (the colored part of the eye) may gain more pigment in the months after she's born, but they usually won't get "lighter" or more blue. (Green, hazel, and brown eyes have more pigment than gray or blue eyes.
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